Subnormal activity in the nucleus accumbens, often characterized by depression, anxiety and craving.
This is a portion of the definition of the word "withdrawal." Usually it refers to drugs, but in this case, it refers to football.
The end of football season sucks. It just sucks. The Lions are done for six months, my fantasy team no longer matters, writing the weekly picks is a distant memory ... it's just depressing. But THIS year, with the mother-freaking CBA negotiations, it's just morbidly painful. The only way I can describe it is subnormal activity in my nucleus accumbens.
I don't have a clue what's going to happen this offseason, or next summer. Truthfully, I don't think anybody knows. I am pretty sure there will be a season, but it wouldn't shock me if it was 14 games or less. I'm not playing close attention to all the CBA talk because to be honest, I truly don't care. I'm impartial. Owners, players, union ... whatever. Just figure it out. I'm a fan, not a stockholder.
This stupid thing is looming over the NFL draft right now and really sucking the wind out of its sails. Usually one of my favorite sports events of the year, this year the draft is a sobering reminder that there might not be a season in 2011. It's like that scene from Lord of the Rings 2, when the accident-prone hobbit says something about going home to the Shire, and Charlie from LOST says, "Don't you understand!? There won't BE a Shire."
Depressing.
Speaking of LOST, does anybody watch the show Parenthood on NBC? First off, it's really good, and well worth watching. However season 1 is not available on NBC.com so you have to find one of those sketchy sites with Chinese subtitles and irritating pop-ups, but it's worth it. A very good show. Anyway, Michael Emerson (also known as Benjamin Linus) made a guest appearance on this week's episode, and it was just awesome to see him again. He played a bug-obsessed man with Asbergers, and did a phenomenal job, of course. But I kept waiting for him to suddenly stab one of the main characters and look down on the bloody body and say blankly "I'm so sorry, Christina, but he broke the rules."
So anyway, the moral of the story is you should watch Parenthood, and I miss football. Moving on ...
-The two-time defending champion Lakers lost to the Cavaliers last night. That's the same Cavs who had lost a record 26 in a row last month. Is this worrisome for Los Angeles? Or just a weird bump before the All Star game? I think it's the latter. I'm not worried about LA, simply because nobody else in the West can contend with them come playoff time. Attribute this loss to a lack of focus, Kobe's illness, and the fact that Cleveland is much better than anybody realizes now that they have Mo Williams back.
-Carmelo Anthony is still a Nugget, and the trade deadline is less than a week away. It's kind of a foregone conclusion that he'll join the Knicks, but New York's GM Donnie Walsh turned down a trade offer yesterday, calling it 'horrendous,' or some word like that. Denver asked for Raymond Felton (B+ point guard), Landry Fields (hustle rookie), Wislon Chandler (decent scorer) and Danilo Gallinari (poor-man's Nowitzki) in exchange for Melo and Chauncey. In my opinion, this is a win for both teams. However, it makes sense for New York to say no - they'll get Carmelo this summer in free agency, and they can keep their support players. It's not like they are winning the 2011 Championship, so they might as well wait. Denver needs to make a trade soon though, or they will get nothing in return for their franchise player. I expect LA and New Jersey to throw out a couple of half-assed bids, but Denver won't take 30 cents on the dollar, and Carmelo will veto those trades anyway. He wants to be a Knick, and he'll be a Knick. But not until this summer.
-Speaking of highly coveted players, have you heard about Albert Pujols? If you listen to ESPN radio, than you certainly have. It seems nobody is excited about baseball season, people are only excited about Pujols season. If you don't follow baseball (Andy), Albert Pujols is the MLB's version of LeBron James. Physically dominant, statistically dominant, the best player in the league by a mile, and now a free agent who is ready to win a championship. I'm not sure where I think he'll end up in 2012 when his contract actually expires, but I know he'll play this season for St. Louis, and put up his usual MVP stats. Next fall the circus will start up again, and it'll be centered on the Yankees and Red Sox, of course. However, if I'm throwing a dart in the dark, my guess is Albert plays the rest of his career in a Chicago Cubs jersey. Here are 3 reasons why:
A) He probably wants to stay in the NL. It's easier to hit, easier to win individual accolades, and easier to get to the World Series.
B) Chicago is desperate to win. Possibly more than any franchise in any sport. They haven't won a title in 337 years.
C) St. Louis and Chicago are HUGE rivals. Probably the second biggest rivarly in baseball. It would just make for a great story if he went there.
-I go to Mexico in 3 days. I will try to write more stuff after that.
Buenos dias. No bebes el agua. Los cocodrilos son feos.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Three Interesting Things which are Somewhat Related to Sports
1) The 2011 Super Bowl broke ratings records as the most watched TV program in American history, with 111 million viewers. Nice.
However, I think that figure is an egregious load of bullcrap and I for one am not stupid enough to accept it. There are 307 million people in the country. Are we really supposed to believe that 196 million Americans did NOT watch the Super Bowl? Think about it. How many people do you know that didn't watch the game? I can't think of a single person. Even people who abhor football show up at Super Bowl parties for the food. Not to mention the commercials.
I think the people who determine TV ratings should be fired. Every single one of them. They are obviously doing a terrible job. They are obviously lazy and aren't striving for accuracy. How do they know how many people showed up at my parent's house for the Super Bowl party? It started as just 6, but it became 12. Do they know about the two children who were there? I mean, Jack sat in front of the TV, clapped a couple times and wore a Steelers onesie while eating pretzels. What else do he have to do to be counted? I mean he probably watched the game in a more intelligent manner than 99% of Steelers fans.
The whole thing is absurd. It really bothers me. Who do they think they're fooling, saying that 196 million Americans didn't watch the Super Bowl? That's completely asinine, and I have a solution: they need to hire me to come up with a better guess. I'll be the official Super Bowl Ratings Vice Counselor. Here's my guess: 250 million Americans watched at least 1 hour of the Super Bowl. That guess is based on nothing in particular and I came up with that guess in less than 3 seconds. But I would bet my life and all my possessions that my guess is closer than the nonsense coming from the so-called experts.
The problem is that they are counting how many TVs are tuned in to the station. For something like Seinfeld, that makes sense. But the Super Bowl is a party event. How many people are watching the average TV set? Are they counting bars and restaurants? What about church parties? When I was in college, two-hundred students would gather in the lounge and watch the game. And I went to a small college. The 111 million figure makes about as much sense as saying 20% of Americans celebrate Christmas each year, because that's how many Christmas trees are purchased. Give me a freaking break.
2) On a more positive note, Celtics guard Ray Allen is going to break one of the NBA's most impressive records on Thursday night. He made his 2,559th three-pointer on Monday against Charlotte, putting him just one behind Reggie Miller for the all-time mark. That's an average of 2.4 threes per game over the course of 1,073 games and 15 seasons. Allen made 41% of them as a member of the Milwaukee Bucks, 34% with the Sonics, and 25% with the Celtics. Fans across America, not just in Boston, will be celebrating Allen's accomplishment.
When Ray breaks the record on Thursday, it will be with 60 less attempts than Reggie Miller, and it will mean he has 813 more threes than the next active player (Jason Kidd). So, all Kidd needs to do is play another 6 seasons. The problem is, he's 37. Allen's only 35.
By the time he's done, Ray might have 600 more threes than Miller and be completely uncatchable. But let's not go there yet. Let's talk about the significance of Thursday's game. First off, it's the NBA's best rivalry, Celtics vs. Lakers, in the NBA's best stadium, the Boston Garden. My contention is that Allen could have broken the record in Charlotte, but purposely chose to wait until this very game. He went 2 for 2 from behind the line in the first half against the Bobcats, and didn't take another three for the rest of the night, despite being on the court in a close game which they ended up losing.
Allen wants to break this record in front of his own fans, the NBA's best fans, in Boston. And he wants to do it while being guarded by the greatest active player, five-time champion Kobe Bryant. The historic scope of breaking this record goes from an 8.3 to a 9.7 just because of the setting.
However, I think that figure is an egregious load of bullcrap and I for one am not stupid enough to accept it. There are 307 million people in the country. Are we really supposed to believe that 196 million Americans did NOT watch the Super Bowl? Think about it. How many people do you know that didn't watch the game? I can't think of a single person. Even people who abhor football show up at Super Bowl parties for the food. Not to mention the commercials.
I think the people who determine TV ratings should be fired. Every single one of them. They are obviously doing a terrible job. They are obviously lazy and aren't striving for accuracy. How do they know how many people showed up at my parent's house for the Super Bowl party? It started as just 6, but it became 12. Do they know about the two children who were there? I mean, Jack sat in front of the TV, clapped a couple times and wore a Steelers onesie while eating pretzels. What else do he have to do to be counted? I mean he probably watched the game in a more intelligent manner than 99% of Steelers fans.
The whole thing is absurd. It really bothers me. Who do they think they're fooling, saying that 196 million Americans didn't watch the Super Bowl? That's completely asinine, and I have a solution: they need to hire me to come up with a better guess. I'll be the official Super Bowl Ratings Vice Counselor. Here's my guess: 250 million Americans watched at least 1 hour of the Super Bowl. That guess is based on nothing in particular and I came up with that guess in less than 3 seconds. But I would bet my life and all my possessions that my guess is closer than the nonsense coming from the so-called experts.
The problem is that they are counting how many TVs are tuned in to the station. For something like Seinfeld, that makes sense. But the Super Bowl is a party event. How many people are watching the average TV set? Are they counting bars and restaurants? What about church parties? When I was in college, two-hundred students would gather in the lounge and watch the game. And I went to a small college. The 111 million figure makes about as much sense as saying 20% of Americans celebrate Christmas each year, because that's how many Christmas trees are purchased. Give me a freaking break.
2) On a more positive note, Celtics guard Ray Allen is going to break one of the NBA's most impressive records on Thursday night. He made his 2,559th three-pointer on Monday against Charlotte, putting him just one behind Reggie Miller for the all-time mark. That's an average of 2.4 threes per game over the course of 1,073 games and 15 seasons. Allen made 41% of them as a member of the Milwaukee Bucks, 34% with the Sonics, and 25% with the Celtics. Fans across America, not just in Boston, will be celebrating Allen's accomplishment.
When Ray breaks the record on Thursday, it will be with 60 less attempts than Reggie Miller, and it will mean he has 813 more threes than the next active player (Jason Kidd). So, all Kidd needs to do is play another 6 seasons. The problem is, he's 37. Allen's only 35.
By the time he's done, Ray might have 600 more threes than Miller and be completely uncatchable. But let's not go there yet. Let's talk about the significance of Thursday's game. First off, it's the NBA's best rivalry, Celtics vs. Lakers, in the NBA's best stadium, the Boston Garden. My contention is that Allen could have broken the record in Charlotte, but purposely chose to wait until this very game. He went 2 for 2 from behind the line in the first half against the Bobcats, and didn't take another three for the rest of the night, despite being on the court in a close game which they ended up losing.
Allen wants to break this record in front of his own fans, the NBA's best fans, in Boston. And he wants to do it while being guarded by the greatest active player, five-time champion Kobe Bryant. The historic scope of breaking this record goes from an 8.3 to a 9.7 just because of the setting.
Only one problem: Kobe is a pretty good defender.
3) Speaking of impressive NBA records, the Cleveland Cavaliers lost on Monday for the 25th consecutive time. That my friends, is the worst losing streak in pro basketball, ever. Which makes me feel like a prophet, because last spring, after the Celtics beat up the Cavs in the playoffs and LeBron essentially quit, I wrote:
"No question about it, Cavs-Celtics 2010 is going to go down as the worst thing that ever happened to Cleveland sports."
Without LeBron, Cleveland started the season with a little oomph, trying to beat the odds, and was 7-9 through November. Then came a 10 game losing streak. Then a single win, 109-102 in overtime, against the Knicks. Then 25 straight loses. Remarkably, the Cavs would be on a THIRTY-SIX game losing streak if Amare Stoudemire's 12-footer as regulation expired would have gone in n December 18th.
During this current losing streak, Cleveland lost leading scorer Mo Williams to a two-month injury. Defensive stalwart Anderson Varejao is already lost for the year. Lately, third-year scrub Ramon Sessions is leading the team in minutes as well as scoring. (he's also averaging 20 points and 10 assists for my fantasy team!)
With an 8-game home stretch and games against Detroit and Washington coming up, Cleveland will break the streak sometime in February. They'll probably get Williams back soon and finish the season with at least 15 wins. Hopefully they'll get a top 3 pick and start rebuilding sooner than later.
But as for Cavs' owner Dan Gilbert and his "guarantee" after the Decision (If you don't remember, he promised that Cleveland would win a title before Miami) ... well I think Abraham Lincoln said it best:
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
That's all I have for today. February is notoriously the worst sports month of the year. Good thing I'm going to Mexico in 2 weeks. Go Lions!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Woohoo!
I'd just like to say I completely NAILED the pick, right down to the detail about Pittsburgh dominating time of possession and the Packers needing to build a two-score lead.
Woodson's injury shifted this whole game and made Pittsburgh's offense more aerial, but ultimately they were betrayed by one of the worst games I've seen Roethlisberger ever play. He almost pulled off his patented "Suck Until The Last 2 Minutes" routine, but the Steelers offense was just a mess throughout, and the 6 point defecit was too much to overcome. If they had been down 3, it was inevitable overtime.
The Steelers didn't lose this game defensively. They held Green Bay's offense to 24 points, and forced 6 punts. They lost because their receivers ran sloppy routes, the offensive line was simply terrible, their kicker missed a 52 yard field goal about 30 yards wide, and Ben was completely inaccurate and inept. His pick-six was one of the ugliest plays in Super Bowl history. Can we stop comparing him to Tom Brady now?
Give a TON of credit to Desmond Bishop and Jarrett Bush, who stepped up and made huge plays all night for the Packers D. Bishop tackled like a beast, and Bush filled in for Woodson and shut down Hines Ward. Nick Collins made a great play on the interception return, and Clay Matthews was his usual dominant self., forcing the fumble which swung the momentum and ultimately won the game for Green Bay. If Rodgers didn't have such a flawless game (24/39, 304 yards, 3 TDs, 0 INTs, 111.5 rating), I would have nominated Matthews for MVP.
But this game was all about Aaron Rodgers, who vaulted past Peyton Manning and Drew Brees and is now neck-and-neck with Tom Brady, the unanimous MVP, for the best quarterback alive. It's funny how one game will do that. He played a near-perfect game against the league's best defense, and surgically picked apart an overrated Steelers secondary while completely avoiding the big-haired Polynesian. It was a masterpiece. No interceptions, no fumbles, and he endured 4 crucial drops.
The star of Rodgers's offense was Jordy Nelson, who had more passes thrown his way than Greg Jennings, James Jones and Donald Driver combined. He finished with 9 catches for 140 yards and 1 TD, though he had 3 of the aforementioned drops. He easily could have gone for 12 catches, 180 yards and 2 TDs, which might have made him the MVP.
The lone goat on Green Bay was cornerback Tramon Williams, who has evolved into an excellent shutdown CB this postseason. But as a return specialist, he couldn't have been more useless. He muffed the first punt of the game, nearly giving the Steelers an early 7-0 lead. Then in the third quarter he didn't field a punt at midfield, let it bounce for 35 yards when he could have caught it and gone down, and then committed a ridiculous roughing penalty for 15 more yards. The Packers should have started at the 50, and instead began inside their own 10.
But nonetheless, Green Bay won, which is all that matters. And I finished my picks just a hair over 54% against-the-spread this season. Next year's goal is 58%.
In just one night, Aaron Rodgers became a super-duper-mega star, Ben Roetherlisberger reverted to being a fat-faced rapist, Jordy Nelson became a household name, Christina Aguilera became an unpatriotic slut, and millions of Steelers fans will have to wait til next year to wave their stupid yellow towels and yell nonsense.
Oh, and the Lions now have the second longest winning streak in the NFL.
Good season everybody. Now we just have to wait 3 months for the Draft, and hope the freaking owners will quit crying and let us have a season next year.
Woodson's injury shifted this whole game and made Pittsburgh's offense more aerial, but ultimately they were betrayed by one of the worst games I've seen Roethlisberger ever play. He almost pulled off his patented "Suck Until The Last 2 Minutes" routine, but the Steelers offense was just a mess throughout, and the 6 point defecit was too much to overcome. If they had been down 3, it was inevitable overtime.
The Steelers didn't lose this game defensively. They held Green Bay's offense to 24 points, and forced 6 punts. They lost because their receivers ran sloppy routes, the offensive line was simply terrible, their kicker missed a 52 yard field goal about 30 yards wide, and Ben was completely inaccurate and inept. His pick-six was one of the ugliest plays in Super Bowl history. Can we stop comparing him to Tom Brady now?
Give a TON of credit to Desmond Bishop and Jarrett Bush, who stepped up and made huge plays all night for the Packers D. Bishop tackled like a beast, and Bush filled in for Woodson and shut down Hines Ward. Nick Collins made a great play on the interception return, and Clay Matthews was his usual dominant self., forcing the fumble which swung the momentum and ultimately won the game for Green Bay. If Rodgers didn't have such a flawless game (24/39, 304 yards, 3 TDs, 0 INTs, 111.5 rating), I would have nominated Matthews for MVP.
But this game was all about Aaron Rodgers, who vaulted past Peyton Manning and Drew Brees and is now neck-and-neck with Tom Brady, the unanimous MVP, for the best quarterback alive. It's funny how one game will do that. He played a near-perfect game against the league's best defense, and surgically picked apart an overrated Steelers secondary while completely avoiding the big-haired Polynesian. It was a masterpiece. No interceptions, no fumbles, and he endured 4 crucial drops.
The star of Rodgers's offense was Jordy Nelson, who had more passes thrown his way than Greg Jennings, James Jones and Donald Driver combined. He finished with 9 catches for 140 yards and 1 TD, though he had 3 of the aforementioned drops. He easily could have gone for 12 catches, 180 yards and 2 TDs, which might have made him the MVP.
The lone goat on Green Bay was cornerback Tramon Williams, who has evolved into an excellent shutdown CB this postseason. But as a return specialist, he couldn't have been more useless. He muffed the first punt of the game, nearly giving the Steelers an early 7-0 lead. Then in the third quarter he didn't field a punt at midfield, let it bounce for 35 yards when he could have caught it and gone down, and then committed a ridiculous roughing penalty for 15 more yards. The Packers should have started at the 50, and instead began inside their own 10.
But nonetheless, Green Bay won, which is all that matters. And I finished my picks just a hair over 54% against-the-spread this season. Next year's goal is 58%.
In just one night, Aaron Rodgers became a super-duper-mega star, Ben Roetherlisberger reverted to being a fat-faced rapist, Jordy Nelson became a household name, Christina Aguilera became an unpatriotic slut, and millions of Steelers fans will have to wait til next year to wave their stupid yellow towels and yell nonsense.
Oh, and the Lions now have the second longest winning streak in the NFL.
Good season everybody. Now we just have to wait 3 months for the Draft, and hope the freaking owners will quit crying and let us have a season next year.
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